Crap?

So I just checked out the amount of my blog posts here and I realized that I wrote a lot more 2 years ago than I did last year...

...which is disappointing, yes.

Actually, during my first few weeks of college I intended to write a lot more especially since I'm in a new environment.. but it turns out it wasn't that easy. Not only am I swamped with assignments (I'm learning a foreign language and studying my major as well, gosh) I also haven't had the opportunity to have anything good to read, apart from college-related stuff.

Which means I didn't have anything good to write about. Even now I don't; I just currently feel the need to pour my heart out.

I also didn't want to write crap, either. You know, like meaningless stuff that leads to no conclusion. (Oh wait, then probably this post counts as crap... never mind)

During winter break I started reading this really good book about moral philosophy and thankfully it had a few relations on the paper that I was currently working on, so it was really helpful. Like, totally.

But then I bought my favorite manga... and the rest is history.

Come to think of it, I might have been in a phase where I'm digging up enough information and filling up my brain (what kind of phrase is that) before I pour it out to everyone else. There's a term for that in Stephen Covey's 7 Habits, but I forgot what it's called...

Well, actually it's not about just the contents of what I write, it's about how I write it. Most writers advise that you should just write without thinking if you want to become a good writer. And I couldn't agree more with that. But the thing is, sometimes, it's not easy to make a good sentence, let alone a wonderful piece of writing. Even now I am currently writing and thinking at the same time of how I should deliver my sentences so that they're beautifully written. I still do that a lot when I'm writing my academic papers; sometimes I get a bit frustrated if the sentence doesn't look well written enough to me.

I also need to learn a lot more about the art of expanding my ideas a bit more thoroughly. 'Cause there are times when you want to just pour everything out but you don't know how to. Like, I get these ideas once in a while popping in my head, but because I don't know a lot about it it's hard for me to write it down since I don't have enough knowledge of what I'm writing about.

I can't guarantee myself that I'll write a lot more though, but I'll try. I'm not the type of person who'd dedicate myself to writing once a week or something like that because there are waaay too much distractions... but I definitely want to write a lot more. And I hope to be able to increase not only the quantities but also the qualities of this blog.

Oh, and about the language, I might switch it quite often, depends on my mood. My brain is currently set in English (I don't know how to explain this..) which gets me in the mood to write in it right now. As for Indonesian, I prefer to write in formal language since 'bahasa gaul' (or whatever they call it these days) sounds less artistic to me and formal language kinda shapes my way of thinking into more mature. And who knows, when I'm fluent enough I might write one in Japanese.

And I also need to think and contemplate a lot more about what I learn in class, through my reading materials... and life.

So there you have it; my piece of crap.