Zulfa's blog

Recently, I have been spending most of my time contemplating about introversion, and the way I normally cope with my surroundings. As a college student living far away from home, not only I learn to live independently from my parents, but I also start becoming self-dependent; which practically means not relying too much on others. I began to realize that since college has started, I normally spend about 60-70% of my time alone, due to my introverted personality and the circumstances that does not enable me to spend a lot of time with my closest friends. My friends and I are mostly busy and have our own things to be done, so sometimes we cannot meet too often. Furthermore, I only have a small circle of friends of which I am very close with, which is also why I spend most of my time in solitude. Don't get me wrong; I love being alone, and for me, solitude is a bliss. Moments of solitude are moments where I can think and reflect deeply on my thoughts and opinions about my life and...

I spend most of my time alone. There's nothing to be pitied about Since I love spending time alone As much as I love Spending time with my closest friends But, see Anywhere I go I can never Fit in I am not someone Who lowers my defense So easily I am not An easy person To befriend with, let alone being loved By a significant other. Probably explains why I am used To do many things all alone Even so, I enjoy being alone, And highly value my solitude. But, sometimes When these thoughts come I feel lonely. And no matter how much I love being alone, I don't fancy being lonely.

Dalam seminggu terakhir, hidup saya beserta kawan-kawan diliputi ketakutan dan kecemasan yang seakan tak mau hilang. Semangat awal tahun ajaran, di saat anak-anak memasuki gerbang sekolah dengan penuh harapan, terpaksa diinterupsi oleh bencana yang datang tak terprediksi. Rutinitas keseharian yang penuh keteraturan dalam seketika terobrak-abrik dengan adanya gempa bumi yang meluluhlantakkan bangunan serta menggoncang jiwa para penduduk sekitar. Tanpa kita sadari, bencana mempunyai potensi untuk menyentak kesadaran kita akan betapa berharganya kehidupan sehari-hari yang sesekali terasa menjemukan dan melelahkan. Berkumpul dengan banyak orang lain di suatu tempat yang jauh dari rumah, dan tidak ada yang bisa dilakukan selain menunggu. Menunggu bukanlah suatu aktivitas yang menyenangkan jika pikiran kita selalu dihinggapi kekhawatiran dan rasa takut yang mencegah kita untuk memejamkan mata dan beristirahat sejenak. Berada dalam keadaan seperti itu, membuat kita ingin kembali pada keg...

Beberapa hari yang lalu saya menyempatkan diri berkunjung ke toko buku yang cukup besar dan terkenal bersama sahabat-sahabat saya. Awalnya, saya berkeinginan untuk membeli buku fiksi dan nonfiksi berbahasa Indonesia (murni, bukan terjemahan) agar bisa saya bawa saat kembali ke Jepang. Saya mendapatkan beberapa buku fiksi yang memang sudah saya inginkan sejak lama. Namun sayangnya, saya tidak menemukan banyak buku nonfiksi yang cukup menarik untuk saya bawa pulang. Saat saya menelusuri bagian buku-buku nonfiksi, yang saya temukan sebagian besar adalah buku-buku nonfiksi yang merupakan buku-buku kuliah, dan sangat sedikit buku-buku nonfiksi yang diperuntukkan bagi konsumsi publik. Walaupun akhirnya saya membeli satu buku nonfiksi, namun saya tetap saja kecewa dengan kenyataan yang telah saya lihat. Sudah menjadi rahasia umum bahwa budaya literasi Indonesia masih tertinggal jauh dibanding negara-negara lain. Menghabiskan waktu membaca buku tidaklah lebih menarik dibandingkan, katakanl...

My first semester as a college student has officially ended, and I am currently home for the holidays. My decision to come home for the holidays was quite sudden and unplanned. Considering the local weather and my health conditions back then, I decided to go back so that I could recover myself physically and mentally. Coming home urges me to re-evaluate myself and and see how much progress I've made, which is what I'll write about now. As I look back, I realized that I gained numerous memorable and unforgettable experiences during the last 4 months. I went through a lot of things that I would not be able to experience if I decided to study in my home country. I met the most wonderful people with the most beautiful minds and interesting personalities here, not only Japanese or Indonesians, but people from across the globe, whether it be professors, fellow students, seniors, and the local people. Since practically I had to do almost everything by myself, I had the opportunity...

Menjadi dewasa tidaklah mudah. Tumbuh dan menjadi dewasa, berarti kita telah beranjak dari satu fase kehidupan dan memasuki fase kehidupan yang lain. Meninggalkan masa remaja dan mulai memasuki kehidupan nyata, serta mulai membuat keputusan nyata dan mengemban tanggung jawab atas hasil dari keputusan tersebut. Pelan tapi pasti, kita memegang kendali atas hidup kita, dan orangtua bukan lagi pengambil keputusan utama. Dahulu, saat kita kecil, mungkin sebagian besar dari kita merasa jenuh dengan berbagai aturan yang diterapkan orangtua dalam rumah, dan terpana melihat orang dewasa begitu bebas dalam menjalani kehidupan. Dahulu, mungkin kita ingin sekali cepat-cepat dewasa, agar bisa mencicipi nikmatnya kebebasan dan tidak melulu harus patuh pada aturan atau larangan ini-itu. Sekarang, saat saya perlahan-lahan meninggalkan masa remaja dan mulai beranjak dewasa, saya menyadari suatu hal; kenyataan bahwa kitalah pemegang kendali utama hidup kita terdengar sedikit menakutkan. Kenya...

So I just checked out the amount of my blog posts here and I realized that I wrote a lot more 2 years ago than I did last year... ...which is disappointing, yes. Actually, during my first few weeks of college I intended to write a lot more especially since I'm in a new environment.. but it turns out it wasn't that easy. Not only am I swamped with assignments (I'm learning a foreign language and studying my major as well, gosh) I also haven't had the opportunity to have anything good to read, apart from college-related stuff. Which means I didn't have anything good to write about. Even now I don't; I just currently feel the need to pour my heart out. I also didn't want to write crap, either. You know, like meaningless stuff that leads to no conclusion. (Oh wait, then probably this post counts as crap... never mind) During winter break I started reading this really good book about moral philosophy and thankfully it had a few relations on t...